I have made so many changes over the past year, that I think that my “duck like” (read Like A Duck) behavior has been fairly stable.  I am fearful that I’m becoming slightly ruffled.

In January 2008, my family moved to Somerset from Indiana, PA.  I love it here, we moved into our ski house and we loved it there.  I was a stay home Mommy to my two girls, and was in a new place, I went back to work.  We bought some property and started building a house.  I bought a horse.  I started exercising. I started writing. I became a better person. I found that my faith was something that I needed to work on, I found that I needed to breathe more… so I did that too. I have been working now at my job for one year, and have told the folks that I work with that my job is the most wonderful thing ever.  It’s not just a job, it is something that I am passionate about and honestly love.,  So that’s good.  So why have I felt like I cannot catch my breath over the past few weeks? 

I’ve changed up my routine a little, tried to keep it fresh and moving and keep everything organized, my children well cared for, and my family , friends and co-workers in my forefront of my thoughts. 

I joined Somerset’s Biggest Loser with my husband, who is an inspiration to me , running ½ marathons each year and a 5K every weekend when there is one.  So I joined it with him, knowing that my body could use some shaping up after 2 babies, being an at home mom, and then possibly over the past year not taking 100% care of myself.  Over the past 6 weeks, I’ve managed to lose like 5 pounds MAYBE, but a lot a lot of inches!

So the past year has been a journey, one that I’m proud to be on, one that I’m proud to be working on, but I’m not sure there is a total goal in my heart so I think that I might be unruffled.

I wonder what the goal is, and how I can possibly put a goal to achieve as “to be the best possible person I can be.”  I don’t think that counts. Does it? I can’t measure it, really.  There’s not a budget to hit, sales goals to achieve.  I am having a hard time wrapping my head around an intangible goal.  I want to be a woman my children look up to, that I am proud to be each day.  My Pap told me once, that I had to face the person in the mirror and that I should always remember that.  You cannot lie to the one who knows you the best.  So my changes are so positive, and I do pat myself on the back for the things that I and my family have achieved. 

Yesterday we rode our bikes about 10-12 miles through Laurel Hill State park, it’s an amazing and beautiful ride, up and down hills mind you, but the water that flows through the park, the wild life, deer… beautiful trees, even in this muddy season, it was a beautiful and peaceful ride.  Today, Nathan and I ran the MountainEAR 5K in Morgantown, WV.  I think I did my best time ever.  Here’s why I don’t know.  My daughter Alison was climbing around as children do, and split her head open on the cement.  Ugh.  A trip to the ER, with a bloody head with knots on it, she probably had a little concussion, but the ER trip was quick and easy.  SO we actually did get to run the race, Alison cheering us on as we started the race 17 minutes late. I think.  So we ran, and when I got back the clock said 51 minutes.  So if that’s the real time that we started, running a 5K outside, I’m not going to say that 34 minutes is too bad.  Not too bad at all.

MAYBE, I should just look at the past year and instead of trying to look for some tangible goal, I should say to myself and those that I love and love me back, hey… not too bad.  Not too bad at all.

"Always behave like a duck- keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil underneath."-Jacob Braude.